What you put in, you'll get back ten fold
Having problems logging in? Please clear your cache and remove the MazdaMenders related cookie from your browser.
If you need assistance doing this, don't hesitate to contact us on FaceBook or email forum-admin@mazdamenders.net stating the browser you use.

Regards
Admin

Smart Answers

Make us laugh, in what ever way that maybe,Jokes, pic's, links etc
User avatar
blackyb
Moderator
Posts: 890
Joined: Tue Sep 17, 2013 8:41 pm
Location: Scarborough

Smart Answers

Postby blackyb » Fri Dec 04, 2015 9:02 pm

It was mealtime during a flight on a British Airways plane:
"Would you like dinner?" the flight attendant asked the man seated in the front row.
"What are my choices?" the man asked.
"Yes or no," she replied.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

A lady was picking through the frozen Chickens at a Woolworths store but she couldn't find one big enough for her family.
She asked a passing assistant, "Do these chickens get any bigger?"
The assistant replied, "I'm afraid not, they're dead."

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The policeman got out of his car and the Teenager he stopped for speeding rolled down his window
"I've been waiting for you all day," the Cop said
The kid replied, "Well I got here as fast as I could."
When the policeman finally stopped laughing, he sent the kid on his way without a ticket.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

A lorry driver was driving along on a country road. A sign came up that read " Low Bridge Ahead"
Before he realised it, the bridge was directly ahead and he got stuck under it..
Cars were backed up for miles. Finally, a police car arrived.
The policeman got out of his car and walked to the lorry's cab and said to the driver, "Got stuck, eh?"
The lorry driver said, "No, I was delivering this bridge and ran out of diesel!

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
A teacher at West Australian University reminded her pupils of tomorrow's final exam..
"Now listen to me, I won't tolerate any excuses for you not being here tomorrow.
I might consider a nuclear attack, a serious personal injury, illness, or a death in your immediate family, but that’s it, no other excuses whatsoever!"
A smart-arsed teenager at the back of the room raised his hand and asked, "What would happen if I came in tomorrow suffering from complete and utter sexual exhaustion?"
The entire class was reduced to laughter and sniggering. When silence was restored, the teacher smiled at the student, shook her head and sweetly said, "Well, I would expect you to write the exam with your other hand."

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Telephone rings, woman answers.
Pervert, breathing heavily, says,
"I bet you have a tight ar*e with no hair?"
Woman replies,
"Yes, I have. He's watching the rugby....
Who shall I say is calling?"


:clap:
1993 1.6 Eunos Roadster (gone)
1998 UK Mk 2 1.6 (gone)
2003 1.8 SVT Sport (Why did I sell it!!!!)
1991 1.6 Eunos Roadster with a bit of bling.

Life is a journey, best travelled topless in an MX5!!

Return to “Chuckle Box”

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 1 guest